Tuesday, January 21, 2014

You've got a mail!

Hey, center of attention.
Yes, you used to be ;p

If I could turn back the time, I'll make sure I will pass the entrance exam to your university. I will study harder so I could attend the same class with you. So I could socialize in your environment. Because maybe, only that way I could understand your point of view. Without judging you.

If I could turn back the time, I'll come back to our hometown and  get a job there. So maybe you won't go to this city. This city is too full of temporary escapes. It's hard to be  original here. I will come back to our hometown. Build something strong. Together with you.

If I could turn back the time, I'll not let you go to this city. (See? I repeat it again)

All the tragedy I mentioned above always, always, makes me blame my self.
..........

Then I realize, it's not only me in the relationship. There were you. And there's not only my decisions, but also yours.

I always think that I am open with anything. I don't mind if some of people I know love to party on the friday night until dawn and forget their family just like that or being so flirty with so many people or have wifes here and there or have an affair with their collegue at work or being an alcoholic or a smokers or even involved in drugs. I don't mind. 
But, when it comes to you....
I just can't. I don't want to.
I am not that open.

Because I care..........too much.
And that's my biggest mistake.
I forgot, that is your life..

It is not a birthday wish,
Because your birthday is still a week ahead.
It is just a hope from a friend who care,
I hope you have a MAGNIFICENT LIFE.
And be more carefull about your health. 
Mens sana in corpore sano, eh? 
Hehe ^^

Saturday, January 11, 2014

it seems the 7th is a bad luck for me


Nur Asfari Dewi, there are things who not supose to be together. Maybe not now or maybe not forever.
It's enough punishing your self. You better move. You should move. Yes, You have to move on, Darling. Open up your heart for things and people in front of you. You better take a direct step from now on. And don't look back.
Look! There's something beautiful ahead. You deserve happiness. Not only the people you love.
Be happy, be gratefull, be live.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Nyanyian hujan


Mengetahui bahwa sebenarnya bisa bersama, ketika memilih untuk tidak rasanya seperti ditarik jiwa dari raga yg mencengkram kuat. 
Kenapa memilih seperti ini?
Saat jiwa yg menangis bukan air mata yg keluar. Tapi jeritan tak terdengar yang terasa sakit dan menekan.
Kamu. 
Kakiku melangkah ketika wajahku masih menoleh kebelakang. Masih menangis namun terus berjalan. Seketika berhenti. Jongkok. Meratap. Menjerit. Lalu kembali mencoba berjalan.
Untuk menyentuhku dengan ujung jarimu saja, bisa membawaku ke nostalgia masa lalu. Memori-memori diputar balik secara otomatis. 
Kau tumbuh. Tanpa mataku disekitarmu. Dan kau tetap tumbuh menjadi dirimu dan sejumput lingkunganmu.

Sekarang kau jadi sangat merindukan dan menyakitkan. 
Tapi saat ini...
ya, aku rindu. Sangat rindu. 
Kau dengar?